Goodbye cigarettes. It's been fun, but we're done. I hope...

I have been smoking for almost half my life. Fifteen of my thirty one years have been spent in a haze of cigarette smoke. And I loved it. Well, at least the pleasure receptors in my brain did, what with all the extra dopamine that nicotine tricks you with.

I was well aware of the risks, of course I was. But I went with it. I was sixteen, I'd left school the year before, got a job, got a tattoo. I was all growed up.

My relationship with cigarettes since has been somewhat turbulent. I tried to break it off numerous times but, my will being weak, inevitably ended up returning and begging for forgiveness. I was always welcomed back with open arms.

Nothing could deter me.

The cost? Nah, i enjoyed smoking too much. And besides, I'd only waste the money on something else.

The cost to my health? I used to avoid the doctor like the plague. In fact, it would have taken me getting the plague to even consider visiting my GP. So if there had been anything wrong, I'd have been blissfully unaware. The indoor smoking ban? I loved it! There was a real sense of camaraderie as you stood on the footpath outside a pub in all weathers and shared a conversation with a complete stranger, or gave a light or a cigarette to a random person whose path you would never have crossed otherwise. When pubs caught on and started providing warm, comfortable smoking areas, then it was even better. The closest i ever got to seriously quitting was after family members were struck with lung cancer. I came close, but carried on regardless, owing to a mixture of weakness and idiocy. That has all changed in the last week, and It's all thanks to my shiny new e-cigarette. For the first time in fifteen years, I'm not smoking (and no, vaping is not as bad as smoking. I don't care what anyone says). I feel better already and my wallet is better off to the tune of seventy euros. (The e-cig is worth about fifty quid but a friend of mine gave it to me when he bought a new one, and all he wants in return is a few pints next time were out and about. Cheers Matt!) One thing i was worried about was how it would effect my writing. I used to practically chain smoke when writing, convincing myself it helped me focus and relax. And maybe it did to a certain degree. But having completed a fair bit this week, including completing and submitting a short story, chipping away at a couple of other projects, and working on getting a website on the go (which will hopefully go live soon), my fears seem to be unfounded. So far. I don't know if i will actually stay off the fags for good this time, but it's the best I've ever felt in attempting to do so. I'm going to keep a tally of my progress here each week to try to keep myself honest. Wish me luck! Short stories completed: 1 Cigarettes smoked: 0